So some of you may have heard that King and I procured one of those newfangled 'Zybok Revolutions.' Well I can assure you that is a complete falsity, and I will go on to prove it by showing you just how incredibly awesome becoming a strog on Quake 4 on the Zybok Rev is. (Spoilers people, spoilers.)
In this first picture here, you can clearly see that our protagonist, good ol' Matt Kane, has legs. Oh yes. He's got 'em. But note also that he is on some kind of creepy amusement park ride, much like Snow White's Scary Adventure at Disneyland (which, if anyone remembers from their childhood, was fucking creepy and built distinctly to haunt your goddamned dreams.). Mostly I say this because of two things. One being the dark, and the second being the big bloody rusty fucking saw top right. Not good news, those big bloody rusty saws. (Okay, so maybe no big bloody rusty saws in 'Snow White's,' but it's still creepy.)
Photo two. NO GODDAMN LEGS! Note also the gaping hole in his abdominal area that I forgot to mention in photo one. Distressing.
Photo three! That's right. Kane's a strog. In fact, he's a relaxing strog. You can almost picture a frosty strog margarita in his strog hand with a cute little strog umbrella in it. Oh wait. You're not imagining it. BECAUSE ITS REAL. Yeah. Who'd have thought THAT?
Suddenly being tortured on Snow White's Scary Adventure doesn't seem so pointless. Now it's freaking cool. And you get drinks and stuff. You naysayers can just try to disagree. (But you can't. And you know it.)
3 comments:
Waitaminute. That maggie in Kane's left hand is totally photoshoppe'd in. Obviously a fake. Mathew Kane's more a rum kinda guy.
I am shocked and appaled that you would question my credability, sir.
Photoshoppe'd in? Uh-oh...better thak a look at the previous post in which she destroyed something that was already not working...:P Just kidding.
The no legs and gapping hole scare me...
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